This is one of the many reasons why you should vote for Tierce in the Fido Casting Call contest. You can vote every day!
Me: Tierce! Inside!
Tierce: Sure. Do-dee-doody-doo
Me: Tierce! IN. NOW.
Tierce: Okay, okay…
Me: What is that?
Tierce: Muff i’ wha’?
Me: That filthy… thing you have in your mouth. It looks like a shrivelled capybara fetus.
Tierce: Uh a ‘all.
Me: A ball? You could have fooled me. A shrunken head, maybe. Anyway, you’re not bringing it inside.
Tierce: AWWW!
Me: Drop it. Now.
Tierce: *mumble, mumble*
Me: What was that?
Tierce: Nothing. Oh look, there’s Mischa.
Mischa: Why aren’t you letting the dog in?
Me: He has something disgusting he wants to bring inside.
Tierce: Oh, hey, I’m in the house. Better check out things in the living room.
Me: TIERCE! Did you bring in that ball when I told you not to? Where is it?
Tierce: What ball?
Me: Okay, maybe it’s still outside. Thing’s so filthy, it blends right in with the dirt.
***
Me: Tierce, don’t stick your cold nose into my neck.
Tierce: I’m at the end of the bed and don’t know what you’re talking about.
Me: Then wha- OH MY DOG! EW!
Mischa: What?! What?
Me: IT’S THAT DISGUSTING BALL. HE DID IT! HE SNUCK IT INSIDE AND DROPPED IT RIGHT BESIDE MY HEAD ON THE PILLOW WHILE WE SLEPT!
Tierce: Can you keep it down? It’s, like, 4 in the morning. Some dogs are trying to sleep around here.
Me: How did you do it?
Tierce: Can’t reveal my secrets.
Me: Why did you drop it near my head?!
Tierce: Needed to keep it safe. With your breath, no one’s going to come near it.
Me: OKAY! THAT’S IT! OUT! OUT!
Mischa: Hon, don’t you think you’re over-
Me: NO I’M NOT OVERREACTING! HE DID IT ON PURPOSE! HE DID IT TO SPITE ME!
Tierce: *yawn* Well, I’d better go downstairs, since you’re being so noisy and all.
Mischa: Uh… Babe, why don’t you go back to sl- Why are you barricading the door?
Me: Because he’ll come back with something more disgusting than that thing! Who knows what else he’s got hidden?
Mischa: Okay, let’s just go back and get some-
Tierce: *whine* Hey, I need to go out.
Vote for Tierce and his toys in the Fido Casting Call Contest!
With Saki it’s dead mice. He plays with them until they are dead, then brings them to me to “fix” because they don’t “work” anymore! I have to dispose of them outside; otherwise he sits at the garbage can and talks (like he does when he’s trying to convince you that your meal needs to be in his stomach.) Gotta love those Shibas !
Saki’s mother, a devoted Shiba slave from St. Louis, Mo