Say Hello To My Little Friend

Me:  Hey Tierce, meet Emma, Stu and Shannon’s dog.

Tierce: Hey, baby, how you doin’?

Emma: Who the hell are you?

Tierce: The finest Shiba you’ll ever be privileged to meet in your LIFE.

Emma:  Um, yeah.  Sure.  By the way, I’m spayed.

Tierce:  Well, I’m neutered.  Doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.

Emma:  I don’t feel comfortable taking our acquaintance to that kind of level.

Tierce:  Hey, you just need to get to know me bett-

Emma:  PISS OFF.

Me:  Tierce, lie down.

Tierce:  *Sigh* FINE.  You know, it’s not like I DID anything…

Emma (my friends’ dog):  I don’t know about this.  He looks rude and uncouth.

Tierce:  FLY

Me:  Tierce!  Get back here!

Emma: Where? Where?

Tierce:  THERE.

Me:  Tierce!  Down!

Shannon:  Emma!

Emma:  FLY

Tierce:  FLY

Shannon, Mischa, Me:  DOWN!

Tierce:  But, it’s FLYING and it’s THEREthereTHEREthereTHERE.

Emma:  Look, it’s obviously threatening us.  We need to organize a pre-emptive strike.

Tierce: FL- it’s gone.

Emma:  You see, you bring a strange dog in here and now the fly got away.  Now it’s in the house somewhere.  Waiting.

Tierce:  Where’d it go?

Emma:  We DON’T KNOW.  Because YOU MISSED IT.

Tierce:  No wonder you don’t have any friends.

Emma:  Why?

Tierce:  You’re such a bitch.

Emma:  …

Tierce: …I meant as it applies in human nomenclature.

Emma: …Right.

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The Misanthropic Shiba

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