The Misanthropic Shiba

Tierce: It’s hot.

Me: Well we’re at the lake. Go swimming.

Tierce: No.

Me: Why? You like splashing around in it.

Tierce: If it touches my back, it will swallow me up.

Me: It will not. See? I’m swimming.

Tierce: You’re crazy. There’s MONSTERS in there.

Me: Oh, don’t be silly. Come on.

Tierce: No.

Me: Too bad; you’re going to learn that water won’t hurt you.

Tierce: NO.

Me: Okay, don’t worry. I’ve got you.

Tierce: This is bad! Let me go!

Me: Ouch! Stop it!

Tierce: I’m just trying to get back to shore before the water gets me.

Me: It’s not going to get you. Now isn’t that nice and cool?

Tierce: I hate you.

Me: How’s the water.

Tierce: Cool and refreshing and I still hate you.

Me: Okay, good boy! Now swim to shore!

Tierce: Hate, hate, hate.

Me: There, now aren’t you cooler?

Tierce: Much, owing to your cold, cold heart.